What blog?

Adjusting to two kids has been a bit challenging. Rewarding.... but challenging. So, sorry... not much time to blog. Things are going really well though... Will is starting to get on a bit of a schedule in terms of his sleeping (although, sleeping during the day usually requires me to hold him.) I really cannot complain about his night-time sleeping though. Being a breastfed baby, he is wonderful. He'll fall asleep between 8pm-9pm and he'll sleep for about 4 hours. Then he's up every 2-3 hours after that until about 8am. And he's such a snuggler too - I love it!
Matthew is a GREAT big brother... He adores Will, and it's so neat to see the two of them together. He's a great help to me too - when I ask him to get me a burp rag, or his Nuk - he does it without even being asked twice. The hardest part is dividing my time - THAT is the adjustment! For everyone! I'm trying to learn to not feel so guilty every time Matthew asks me to play with him, but I need to attend to his crying (or in most cases, his eating) brother. I make it a point to give each one of my boys (Drew included!) my undivided attention each day. That's the best I can do... however, I think I'm going to need to start carving out some "me" time very soon. For now, I have coffee "dates" with my girlfriends once per week (love you, Shan and Brit!) while all the "big" kids are at school - and I LOVE that time with them. We get a chance to talk to each other without having to constantly intervene with our 3 and 4 year olds. And starting next week, my friend Sarah and I are mall walking with our babies since she has a little girl a month older than Will... it'll be a good start to shedding that baby weight.... I have about 15 pounds to go and I haven't even started any regular exercise routine yet - I CAN DO IT! So hopefully I can start getting back on a regular blogging schedule. Bare with me as I continue to figure out this Mommy-of-more-than-one-kid thing. :-)

William's Birth Day - September 13, 2010

Well, I've got a few minutes to tell the story of Will's birth. Things have been hectic around here, even with Drew home. Everyone was right when they told me that's it's hard to go from 1 to 2 kids. Matthew has had a few adjustments to get used to... like Mommy not being able to play with him whenever he wants. Slowly but surely, we will all adjust, and it will become normal again... Anyways, here's Will's Birth Day story...

On Saturday, September 11, I was really feeling yucky. Very emotional, VERY uncomfortable, and I could hardly walk normally. I laid in bed pretty much all day long watching old episodes of Friends, and some of Matthew's movies (when he wanted to rest with Mom). I was having contractions, but none of them were regular, AT ALL. I didn't even worry about trying to time them... I knew that they weren't the real thing. Come Sunday morning, Sept. 12, I realized that I was having contractions a bit more regularly. So I decided to carry around a mini notebook with me all day. In the morning, the contractions were anywhere from 10-15 minutes apart. They stayed that way all morning and early afternoon. I ran some errands alone while Drew stayed home with Matthew. Once I got home, I ate, took a bath and then plopped down on the couch to watch the Packer game at 3:15pm. Literally, at 3:15, my contractions started to get stronger, and also were noticeably closer together. For the next hour they were 3-5 minutes apart. I remembered from my childbirthing class that if the contractions are consistent even when you change positions, and walk around, then it's reall labor. I sat, I laid down, I walked around the house... they continued to be 3-5 minutes apart. At that time, I realized that this *may* be "it". I decided to wait until 4:45pm to call the on-call doctor to let them know about my contractions. The after hours nurse told me that the Doctor on call would be getting back to me shortly. She called back and since I was mid-contraction, Drew had to talk. She advised us to come in since they were only 3-5 minutes apart. We packed up the rest of our stuff, waited for my mother in law to arrive to watch Matthew, and we were on our way! We arrived at the hospital at 6:30pm. They put me in a labor and delivery triage room where they checked me and hooked me up to the monitors. I was "contracting up a storm" as the nurse said, and was a little more than 3 cm. dilated and 80% effaced. They wanted to keep me there to see if I would progress before really admitting me into labor and delivery. So Drew and I walked the halls, sat on the yoga ball, and tried to get labor going... contractions started to hurt... the resident on the floor checked me at 9pm and said that I wasn't quite 4 cm. yet, and if I couldn't get to that point before 10pm, that they would send me home. I walked more, bounced on the ball more, and by 10pm I was "just about" 4cm... so thankfully they admitted me into a labor and delivery room! I continued to labor, with the contractions getting stronger and stronger, until about 2am. At which time, I decided to get into the shower fro comfort. I got in for about 30 minutes, then got back into bed and FELL ASLEEP! I woke up 30 minutes later and realized that I wasn't really having any contractions.. I started to panic a little. I called the nurse in, she checked me and I was still at 4cm! She told me that she'd wait until 4 or 5am to call my OBGYN (Dr. Webb) to see what to do next. Well, I waited, and waited... 5am came and went and the nurse still hadn't come back. I called her in and she said that the floor was super busy so they were playing the "waiting game" with me. Uh, seriously?? The waiting game? I started to get pretty pissed. At 7am, the resident came in (whom I really didn't like from the get go because she was convinced that I was 4cm in the labor and delivery triage and almost sent me home the night before), and told me that since my contractions had subsided, and I was still at 4cm, that she believes my OBGYN would be sending me home because she would be in her other office today which is 30 minutes from the hospital and wouldn't be able to get there on time. I started to cry... I wanted my baby! I had been almost ready to get an epidural hours before because the contractions were starting to hurt so bad, and now they were telling me that they were sending me home? Well, come 7:30am, the nurses changed... my "new" nurse told me to walk around a bit and then see what happens. So , we did. Drew did everything in his power to gear me up for the worst - telling me that maybe I could be induced the next day and he and Will could share a birthday. As we walked, we saw our nurse talking to my OBGYN in the hall. Dr. Webb told me that she was going to be changing and then heading right to my room to talk to me. I fully prepared myself for her to send me home and then have me come back in the morning and be induced. Dr. Webb walked right in, looked at my monitors and said "Well, I think it's time I just break your water." I was in shock. I thanked her repeatedly, and then asked why she wasn't sending me home like the resident had said she was going to. She told me that the resident failed to tell her I was having regular contractions on my own all night long. How can you fail to tell my own doctor that? I was dumbfounded, but ecstatic that I wasn't going to be sent home when I was 4cm, and 80% effaced! My doctor then broke my water around 9am, which at that time I was 5m dilated. By 10am, my contractions were so strong, and I was VERY ready for an epidural. I got my epidural in by 10:30am. I laid on my side, and took about a 20 minute cat nap while Drew ran to get something to eat. Once he got back, the nurse came in around 11:00am to empty my catheter, and said that Dr. Webb would be here shortly to check me. She arrived in my room around 11:15, and to my suprise said "You're complete!" I was shocked that it had happened that quickly! I started bawling (tears of joy, of course) and think I said something like "I've waited 10 years for this baby!" (referring to having Drew's baby) The nurses got everything prepped, and had me push. I pushed a total of 3 times, and at 11:39am on September 13, William Andrew Zimmerman was born. He was covered in vernix but was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Drew was giggling, and I was crying. It was a moment I will never forget. After holding him for a while, and nursing him for the first time (he's a pro!) Drew took him over to get weighed and measured. Will was a surprising 8lbs. 6oz. and 19 inches long. It was such a whirlwind of a birth - once it got going, it was so quick! He apparently wanted his own birthday too - not to share with Daddy, cousin Maggie, or great aunt Patti...

I feel so incredibly blessed to have a healthy baby boy - let alone a healthy family! Matthew has been a wonderful big brother, showering him with kisses and hugs. And Drew as a Daddy... WOW. That's all I have to say. This past week, I've cried numerous times just watching Will with his Daddy. It's amazing and I am so lucky to have the family that I do.

More on Baby Will and the Zimmerman's to come...

William has arrived!

William Andrew arrived on Monday, September 13, 2010 at 11:39am. He weighed 8lbs. 6 oz. and was 19 inches long. He is absolutely perfect and we are all doing well! Birth story to come in a few days! In the meantime, here's a picture!

Anticipation

I know it's been a couple weeks since I blogged last... I think the anticipation of this baby is driving me batty. I constantly feel like I should be doing something to make sure (double sure) that this house, our family, and myself are all ready to have this baby. Yesterday, I found myself typing out a list of Matthew's "daily routine" and hanging it on the refridgerator for whomever is taking care of him while I'm in the hospital. I guess it's not too crazy now that he's in 4K at a public school, and he needs to get put on the bus at a certain time every morning.... and well, he's Matthew - thrives on routine!
I went to the Dr. yesterday for my 38 week appointment. I'm 2-3 cm. dilated and 80% effaced. Will's head is fully engaged in my pelvis. According to my doctor, I'm "very ready" to have this baby. Well, YEAH! I can feel that I'm ready. Every ounce of my being has waited to meet this baby since I knew I was going to marry and have a family with Drew. Did I mention that I feel like I have knives in my ass? Yeah, the joys of pregnancy... every aspect of them. I'm in pain... a lot of pain. I broke down in tears 2 nights ago because "my ass was on fire" and then again this morning with Matthew because "Mommy's tushy hurts". My sweet boy just hugged me and let me cry a few tears on him. The past few days, he's been making me beds on the couch and covering me with his stuffed animals. He knows just how to make someone feel better.
So this anticipation... everyday I wake up thinking "this could be the day..." but then it's not. I made "Labor Cookies" last week (ginger snaps with cayenne pepper in them that are supposed to kick start labor). The cookies were good. I ate a lot of them. Had consistent contractions for 2 hours. Then, of course, they went away. Everyday I wonder if this is the last day that Matthew and I have together alone. Either way, I'm anxious, excited and oh so eager to meet this little guy! Until then, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I have an easy labor and that our family of 3 becomes a family of 4 sooner rather than later!
I'll keep everyone posted.... send some "good go-into-labor-vibes" to me......

Humbled

Humbled. That's how I feel right now.
It's amazing to me how generous and supportive so many people in our life have been throughout this pregnancy. Matthew and I just got home from a baby shower that Drew's work threw for us. The generosity of these people is amazing... and it just adds to the generosity and support that we've already received from so many other people throughout this pregnancy journey (even with the few stressors we've had to deal with along the way!) They ordered pizza from Louisa's, and fancy cupcakes from Metro Market. Then showered us with so many wonderful gifts for Will - and even a few for Matthew too! They bought us our fancy pack n play that I wanted, the "must-have" space saver high chair, a couple cute outfits, baby towels & washcloths, designer baby socks (that apparently you can only order online according to Jenny... heehee), feeding necessities, and my personal favorite - his very own sock monkey (I've always wanted to own one of those!).
These people did not have to do this... but they did. Not because they had to, but because they genuinely wanted too - and that feels so wonderful. Another reason why I feel so incredibly blessed.... I frickin' love my life and how it has turned out. Like I've said before, maybe once you go through the tough stuff, and experience true happiness, is when you can genuinely be greatful for all that you have and not take things for granted. I try not too. Life's too short.
In other news... I had my 36 weeks doctor appointment today, and I'm at 1 cm. dilated and 50% effaced. Not too horrible, but I'd be lying if I wasn't a tad disappointed that I wasn't dilated more. However, I do know that it hardly means anything, and that I could go into labor at any point, since I am considered "favorable for delivery". My doctor also estimated his size right now to be about 5 to 5.5 pounds, putting him at 7 or 7.5 pounds by my due date - so he won't be huge! A nice average sized baby, just like me and his Daddy.
That's it for now... I think I'm needing to go put my feet up with some ice water now...

Two years ago (yesterday)...

...I married my very best friend. Drew and I celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary yesterday. It was most likely our last night alone for at least 2-3 months (until I can part with my infant!). Matthew had a sleepover at my sisters so Drew and I could really focus on each other. After dinner we caught ourselves pondering, "Well, what do we do? We never have this much free time together!" We spent the rest of the night watching the sunset by the Milwaukee River, going for a drive, watching a movie and cuddling on the couch. Very relaxing, and just what the two of us needed to do together.

I can't believe how fast those past two years have gone. We talked about how much has happened in these last two years.... and yes, we have been busy. And it's not looking like it's not going to slow down anytime soon. Although, we are greatful, for all the many blessings we have been given (especially in the past year). And we know that we've worked really hard to be "happily married". Marriage is tough, but SO worth it. I've been on the other side, and it's so much better to work hard at something and reap those benefits and share a life with someone who truly loves me and takes care of me. I feel loved. I feel taken care of. I feel happy. What more could I ask for...?

...A healthy baby boy that's due to make his arrival in about 4.5 weeks! Come on Will! We're all so excited to meet you and make our family a family of 4! Here's the lastest picture of me and my belly... I take weekly pictures of myself to see how I progress. (I feel like I look larger in the picture than I really do!)

It's about that time...

I'm almost 34 weeks. Isn't this about the time where most pregnant women start to really complain? Ok, now I remember why... Please, please, please, just bare with me for a few moments as I complain. I promise I won't do it again, because I AM that greatful Mama and I have countless reasons to be thankful for the many gifts that God has given me this year.

Have I mentioned that I get up to pee AT LEAST 5 to 6 times per night. And that when I lie on my left side and straighten my left leg I get this horrible cramp in my butt cheek and leg (so then I switch sides.... again.) And that usually when I lie down to go to sleep, my heart starts racing for some reason, which then prompts Baby Will to start kicking and moving (and yes, "Alien Belly" has arrived). And it doesn't matter if the air conditioning is on at night, I am roasting hot. Like, sweating hot even when my hubby is huddled up in the sheet because he's "cold". And not to mention how I feel like my feet and hands are like balloons ready to pop when I wake up in the morning. Thank you, Summer of 2010, for being one of the hottest, muggiest and buggiest we've had in a LONG time.
OK, my vent is over.... I should say that I LOVE my pregnant belly, even though it's getting so uncomfortable... here's why:

My cousin's husband, Brandon, is fantastic at taking pictures, and he took some shots of us the day after my baby shower - on the hottest day of the year - yes, we were really hot, and I got stung by a bee on my foot! Needless to say, the pictures are worth a thousand words.... they make me smile everytime I look at them. Even though I'm getting to that really uncomfortable point... there's no where else I'd rather be than right here.

You know you're pregnant when...

... you cry when you take out your belly button ring. Not because it hurt. But because I felt like I was saying goodbye to a part of my "youth". Yes. Seriously. That was me about an hour ago.
Ten years ago two of my best friends and I went and got our belly buttons pierced together once we had all turned 18 (since our mothers didn't approve and would only let us once we were "adults"). I have kept in a ring for that long. I think I only bought one or two other rings - and I know the one I took out today has been in for at least 5 years.
It was just getting way to uncomfortable. I feel like my skin is being stretched to the max with this pregnancy, and it was getting to the point where if I touched my belly ring, it was hurting me. So Drew convinced me that it had to go. It never bothered me when I was pregnant with Matthew, and therefore, I kept it in the entire time. Now its gone... probably forever. Some people are telling me that I will probably be able to get put another in once I deliver, but will I want to? Is it appropriate for a 28 year old mother of two to wear one? Long gone are the says of laying out in the sun with my girlfriends, spring break and skimpy clothes.... so what's the point? I doubt if I ever wear a bikini again.... I'm now more of a tankini kind of gal now anyways. Even when I'm not pregnant.
I know its so silly to dwell on this, even for a second.... but getting that belly ring was an important part of me being a young 18 year old... and I did it with my good friends. Friends that I still love dearly, and talk to occasionally, but I haven't seen in years. Maybe it's a reminder of them, and some of the good times we had. (Johanna and Heather - this must mean we need to get together soon. I miss you.)
Either way, it was good while it lasted. And I'm done dwelling on it now... I just hope I don't have a permanent "hole" in my belly button now. Eh....

I'm a swollen, nesting, slacker!

Those of you that check back regularly probably have been asking where I've been.... well, I'm slacking.... or I guess a better way to say it would be - I'm too too busy nesting to blog about, or worry about, anything else! I can proudly say that things are pretty much ready for Will's arrival. 0-3 month clothes are all washed and put away in his dresser. Diapers, wipes, rash cream, Vaseline, burp clothes, etc are all put in their proper places. Crib sheet is washed and on his crib. Matthew and ! spent the morning at Babies R Us getting the last of what I knew I needed (like the MUST HAVE Little Lamb infant seat - equivalent to the Baby Papasan Chair that was an absolute necessity when Matthew was a newborn). My mom was here the week of my baby shower and was in awe of how I wouldn't stop nesting. Once I was done purging the basement, I was in my underwear drawer - organizing everything in it - I didn't care if my mom saw me pulling out my black lacey lingerie - I was on a frickin' mission to get everything in order. Now that I'm 32 weeks, I want things to be ready when this little man decides to arrive! (ahem, and Matthew told me this morning that he thinks Will is coming at the end of August.... we'll see, big brother!)
My sister threw me a fabulous baby shower on the 17th. It was so fantastic. Actually, more than fantastic.... there are no words to how greatful I am for the amount of time and energy it took for her to put it together and all those people that helped her, as well! About 25 of my favorite people were there, and it was just exactly how I wanted it. The food was amazing, and the atmposphere was perfect. My sister and my mom made this sweet toast - and talked about how resilient I am, and how much I deserve the life I live now after the last 4 years of my life. (This amazing shower came a mere 3 days after my ex-husband was charged with 6 more felonies in Brown Co. - all from when we were dating/engaged/married). Talk about timing. Again, I am convinced that good things come to those who wait. I am extremely lucky to have those in my life that care for Drew, Matthew and me so much... and give us the support we need. My baby shower was just another reminder of how family and friends can be so wonderful - even after they've been through hell and back with me. Here are a couple photos from the shower... and yes, I'm puffy.

Check. Check. Check.

Drew had the entire week off of work (and school!) last week... it was AWESOME having him around. It gets lonely when Matty and I are here alone for five straight days (two of which Drew isn't home until nearly 10pm). We were able to do a lot of things that we have wanted to do for a while since he had so much time off. Slowly but surely, we are checking things off of our to-do list BEFORE baby. Drew is a few paint strokes away from finishing our kitchen cabinets (and they look fabulous, by the way.) Crib is bought, and assembled in Will's room. His adorable Pottery Barn wall letters came in the mail, and Drew got those up on his wall, too. We nailed several other things up in our hallway and in Matthew's room. My dear mother-in-law came and sewed some curtains for our bathroom to replace the hideous ones the previous home owners had up. We sold my Stratus (yippee!)... aaaannnnnddd we bought our first mini-van! Yep... I'm officially one of those Mom's with a mini-van. We found the best deal on a used 2006 Honda Odyssey. Let me tell you, it's SO much easier to get me and my belly in and out of. Easier to get Matthew buckled, and I know how much easier it will be once Will comes too. When Matthew was first born, I had a Jeep Cherokee Laredo, and a bigger vehicle is so much nicer when it comes to lugging around that bulky infant seat.
We also were able to spend some time together doing the things we love... like taking Matthew to Summerfest, having bonfires with our cousins, Drew and Matthew had a "boys-only" mini golf outing, we were out on our friends boat to watch the Milwaukee fireworks (Wow, was THAT amazing. BEST fireworks display I've ever seen. And even better on the shores of Lake Michigan looking out at the Milwaukee night time skyline.) We also spent the 4th of July at our house with my sisters family and my parents who had just arrived back from their 10 day vacation out East. It was so nice to all be together (although, we missed Uncle Jake!) We went to our first Greenfield 4th of July parade (where the Wisconsin Marching Band made a special appearance!) and also the fireworks at night, where we literally sat right underneath them.... The kids were all catching the debris and ash pieces from the fireworks. Drew and I were very impressed with the fireworks display.... being that Greenfield is only a suburb of Milwaukee. We weren't expecting them to be as great as they were... and we had been spoiled the night before!
And let me inform you all, that although it's hot, and we DO have our A/C on, I've been feeling pretty good being only 2 months away from my due date. Nevermind the "sausage fingers" and typically swollen feet.... the rest of me feels pretty good. I'm not complaining.... this time, I'm really LOVING being pregnant. I know that I feel different than with my first pregnancy and my mom tells me that I look different too... more"out there" or "basketball-like" - Hey, I'll take it! So mark my word... its July 6 and I'm still feeling pretty good. I'm hoping that I'm still saying this 3 or 4 weeks from now....

It's been 10 years...

Over this past weekend, I had my 10 year high school reunion. Unlike my sister (and my husband) I was one of those people that LOVED high school. Aside from the classes and homework, I adored it. I had many friends - many of whom were in several different "social circles." My parents used to call me a little "social butterfly" - within my little group of friends, I was the one that would always coordinate what we were all going to do on any given Friday and Saturday night. I remember one summer, there wasn't one night where I wasn't with my friends (yes, I kept track). My parents were awesome in terms of letting me have friends over, letting me use the car (oh, remember that little red Honda?!), and allowing me to go places as long as I was home by curfew (and most of the time, I was... really.). My best memories were the times where all of my friends and I would congregate at my house on the deck on a summer night... Ben Olson would get out his guitar and we'd just "hang out", be goofy... and stay up LATE - my parents did not care how late people stayed - they always said that they'd rather have me at home with friends anyways. Perhaps this was a perk of being the youngest child of 3... They had been through 2 teenagers before me and they knew what things to be more leineant on.
Most of my high school friends and I have stayed in touch... we certainly aren't as close as we once were, with the exception of maybe a couple, but since the invention of Facebook and MySpace, it's been alot easier to stay in touch, without doing a whole lot of work.

I must admit that I was really looking forward to this reunion. Most of my close friends couldn't make it, but I knew I'd see a lot of people that I hadn't seen in person in ten years. Drew and I met my close high school friend, Lindsey, and her fiance, Eric out beforehand for some cocktails(or mocktails, for me.) We got Drew and Eric all "up to speed" on who did what, and who was who in the Southwest High School Class of 2000. Once we got to the reunion, it's almost as if those 10 years hadn't gone by at all. How many times did I walk into a football game, prom, a party, or the school commons and see these exact same faces all grouped together? It was all really strange. There was lots of reminiscing going on... good, bad, funny.... my Senior Ball date even filled Drew in on how he "slapped my @ss" right as the professional photographer snapped our posed picture. (hence the slightly funny look on my face). Drew wasn't too amused, but does want the guy to help us with some of our house projects since he lives in Milwaukee and fixes properties for a living. What can I say, my hubby is always looking for a deal :-)

When the night ended, they bid us farwell - for the next 10 years. Next time I see most of those people, we'll be 38 - that's almost 40. Holy crap.

Here's a picture of Drew, Matthew and I before we headed out to the reunion. Next time, we'll have a picture of a 14 year old, a 10 year old and "?" year old next to us.... When I say all that, and then think back about how fast the last 10 years went...WOW, these next 10 are going to fly.

Registered? Check! Swollen feet? Check!

So my big sister has offered to throw me a baby shower. I hadn't expected anyone to throw me one since this is my second. However, my sister and my mom were both adament that I get a baby shower this time around. The believe that this situation (a new and REAL marriage, a completely different and responsible Daddy, a new and excited in-law family, etc.) - just a totally legitimate, totally different pregnancy experience than with my first. I get it. Hopefully those invited will too. This baby boy means so much to me, Drew and the rest of my family. His pending arrival has been this ray of sunshine, this glimer of hope to a family that has had a lot to deal with the last several years - most recently my brother's unexpected divorce. News of my pregnancy came within a few weeks of my brother's not-so-wonderful news... it has been the something positive for us to focus on. So this baby shower means a lot to me... and to my family. It means so much more than giving gifts. We tend to think that all new beginnings deserve all sorts of celebrations. Drew is so excited to be expecting his first (biological) child, and I want the experience of all of it to be just as it would be if it were my first baby. and Matthew has certainly been loving the ride too... As Drew and I registered the other day at Babies R Us, we pushed Matthew along with us in the cart and asked his opinion on what he thinks his little brother might like. He was very helpful. Drew seemed to enjoy the process as well. The only thing he was pretty adament about was the diaper bag. He didn't like the ones I had picked out on Gap.com (saying they were ugly and too girly for a man to carry around), so he picked out this fun orange and grey hobo diaper bag. It's really cool actually! So, registering is done... next project? Turning the already "baby painted" computer room into baby Will's room at the end of the month.
I've also had to say hello to some pretty swollen feet and ankles. This (cooler) week, they haven't been as bad as they were last week when we had all that hot and humid weather here. This weekend is supposed to be hot though. Retaining water is what happens to this Mama come the 3rd trimester (which I am 2 short weeks away from! woot!). People keep asking me if the hot weather has bothered me yet and throwing me mini pity parties telling me how sorry they feel for me being pregnant in the summer... Really? Don't you know how badly I've wanted this prenancy? I may complain, but I'll be fine. I'll have the most amazing prize at the end. And if I do have to complain, I'll just complain to my mom - she gets it - she had my brother in mid-August of '77, which apparently was one of the hottest on record in Milwaukee. Besides, Matthew likes to squirt me with the hose to cool me off! My neighbor across the street (who is due in early December) just got a pool, and will gladly let me sit and cool off when I need to...
I say all this now... lets see what my blog posts look like come July and August...

Seeking the Truth... Keeping the Faith...

This has been my motto.... for the last 4 years anyways. I've been through A LOT. More than most of you even realize. Today, I find myself incedibly lucky to be in the place that I am. Happily married to a man that I truly adore, with a healthy and beautiful 4 year old, pregnant with baby number two, a nice house and living in a city that I absolutely love. My life is far from perfect... I have my bad days, believe me... but most importantly, I find myself deep down happy. If you would have asked me 4 years ago if I would've thought my life would be the way it is today, I would have shaken my head and probably broken down in tears. The spring/summer of 2006 was my lowest point. I had made a decision to leave my husband at the time because of myself seeking the truth of who he really was. I was a 24 year old mom of an adorable 6 month old. I had a job that could barely pay my bills (let alone all the legal fees!) There were people that didn't believe me. There were people that would willingly pass along the rumors about me - how was I "crazy". For what? For leaving a man that was deceitful, untrustworthy, heartless and incapable of love? I had to push past all that nasty stuff and focus on what I knew to be true in my heart. At a mere 24 years old, I did my own investigating, and found out what I knew to be the truth - even though it hurt.... a ton! I had a lot of support from my family - they are a huge reason I am where I am today. Throughout all the turmoil, I kept the faith. I believed. I had hope. I had to have faith that everything happens for a reason. God has a plan. I believed that one day I would have everything that I wanted, and deserved. I showed resilience. I knew deep down that good things would happen to me... and slowly, but surely, they did. I took risks in love. I put myself out there. I had patience. I continued to believe. Going through the bad things, makes the good things that much more sweet.
I still need to remind myself to keep the faith. There will forever be reminders of what I went through... and recently, those reminder get thrown in my face a lot. Many of those reminders are hard to swallow. The things that are plastered across the news on TV... they are hard to hear... but I continue to keep the faith. I am ever so greatful that I knew to seek the truth several years ago. If I hadn't, my life would be tremendously different right now, and undoubtedly, I wouldn't be as happy as I am. I have many people to thank for the roles they played in helping me get to where I am now. You know who you are. I love you... and thank you.

As my husband continues to tell me... onward and upward!

Fantastic Memorial Day weekend

This past weekend was awesome.... spectacular... fantastic. I was with my favorite people, doing things that I love: eating, relaxing, tailgating, baseball game watching, beachin' it, getting manicures and eating some more. My family got to get aquainted with my brothers "new" girlfriend, Lauren, whom we all really enjoy. She's got a lot of energy, and all the kids just love her! To top it off, I had my 24 week appointment yesterday, and guess what? I've only gained 3 lbs. in the last four weeks! So now, my OBGYN thinks I'm right back on track where I should be. Feels like I gained 10 though - but that's probably because Will has been making himself quite comfortable up near my rib cage, so he just feels bigger, and longer!

Heres a few of my favorite pictures from the holiday weekend... I hope yours was as good as

mine!

Here's hubby with Matthew. Any candid of the two of them playing is usually a favorite of mine. Here's a candid of the 3 of us as we were just about to walk into Miller Park for the game. Good belly shot too! My big brother and Lauren walking into the game. Matthew, me and Drew at the Brewer game. A shot of Baby bump and I along Lake Michigan. The cousins - Julia, Matthew, Maggie and Joe. Testing out Lake Michigan! My little guy gazing. In the paddle boat with my mom, Julia, and Maggie. Me and hubby during dinner at Maxie's Southern Comfort.

That's all for now... I have some topics that I have been thinking about, so within the next few days, I'll give you more food for thought....

My son, the male fashionista.

That is what I call my son... He has such a hard time in the mornings (heck, any of the 4-5 times per day that he changes clothes) figuring out what he wants to wear. And I swear, he's never satisfied with the way his clothes look, and therefore, that's why he changes so much. This morning, as I was trying to help him get dressed, he was getting upset because he didn't have a clean shirt that matched his red basketball shorts. "How about a grey shirt?" I ask him. "Nooooo, Mommy, that doesn't MATCH!" I take a deep breath. "How about this really cool Cars one with red in it?" I respond. "No, Mom. I don't like that shirt today." ::I start screaming inside my head:: Oh, I love this little boy to pieces, but my goodness.... There's got to be a way to get him to calm down about his clothes. This is driving me batty!
I mentioned his clothing obsession to his preschool teacher at his parent teacher conference, and she giggled and said "isn't that normally a girl thing?" Exactly what I think. Is this normal for a 4 1/2 year old boy to be so obsessed with clothing and matching? (more so with matching people than anything. ie: he gets upset if I tell him to wear different shoes than his Toy Story shoes to school because he won't match his BFF Jacob.) Also, alot of the size 4 t-shirts a wee bit too small, so I bought him some 5's. Well, he's unhappy with how long the sleeves are. And if the shirt in general is too long, he says he feels like he's wearing a dress, so he tucks it in and usually ends up looking like a Grandpa with his pants hiked way up. I should remind myself that at least he doesn't want to wear enormous clothing like some of the "thug-like" teens these days. And, to some extent, he should care about his appearance - that way he's more likely to take care of himself as he gets older. But, I don't want him to obsess so much about how he dresses. Really, its about WHO he is and not what he LOOKS like. But how do you teach that to a 4 year old? Whenever he gets upset because he won't match Jacob at school, I tell him "But you're not Jacob. You're Matthew. You are your own special person."
Let it be known that I have no problem letting him dress up in his Packers or Badger (or, eeekk, Minnesota Gophers) football uniforms. Or sometimes he wants to dress up in his Buzz Lightyear and Woody costumes so he can act out the movie. As long as it's part of imaginative play, it doesn't bother me. What bothers me is the constant changing of clothes, and the always needing to match people (ahem, every important male) around him. I want him to be his own person... independent, with his OWN sense of style. He shouldn't feel the need to change his clothes all the time in order to feel good about himself. We give him plenty of hugs, kisses, "good jobs" and "I loves you". As a matter of fact, there may not be another child on the planet that is loved more. (Although, most of you moms out there would probably beg to differ).
Drew and I have talked about doing a clothing chart... where Matthew is allowed to change his outfit 2-3 times per day. Once he's got the 2nd or 3rd check mark, that's it. No more changing. (Unless, he gets wet, or muddy... you get the picture though.) This way, he can tangibly see how many more outfits he can change into before he's cut off. Once he can do this without problems for a month, we will reward him. This kid has always responded really well to charts, so I'm thinking this could be a good option for him. Once we get started, I'll update you all on his progress.... for now, thanks for letting me vent. Back to tending to my (sweet) male fashionista....

Hellllooooo hormones...

Seriously, I felt like I was able to really keep my hormones in check up until now. The first trimester, I didn't have any outrageous outbursts of tears or anger.... Nor did I feel like I was holding anything back. During the whole craziness of Matthew's biological Dad's issues, my family kept telling me (and they still do) that I'm the one holding myself together the best out of all of us. Ok, so fast forward to now... Hubbs left for Boston, Matthew was throwing up sick, and I'm left to hold down the fort for 3 1/2 days. I did it, and the house is in one piece, but I am feeling SO irritable, SO annoyed, SO crabby... What's wrong with me?! Oh yes, pregnancy hormones. When everything is magnified by about 100 times. Perhaps when Drew is around his presence just makes me feel better.... whole. I like the feeling of our family being together. I think his little business trip might have just thrown me for a loop, as it is a bit out of the ordinary (he doesn't travel for work that much.) Although, watching my little Matthew fall asleep in my bed the last 3 nights has been pure joy. He's so sweet when he sleeps... especially when he drapes his little 4-year-old arm around me in the middle of the night. ::begins to tear up:: Ah, let's hope that my hormones veer back to their semi-normal state soon....

... and Baby kicks Daddy (finally!)

Yep! Daddy finally felt Baby Will's first kick last night. I think Drew was pretty darn excited about it too. I knew it was going to happen soon because Will's kicks have gotten so much stronger the last few days. I've been down and out with bronchitis and sinus infection that my Doctor diagnosed me with on Monday. I was put on 2 antibiotics and sent home to rest. Thankfully Drew stayed home from work on Monday to care for Matthew, so I could sleep and recooperate. I don't know what I would have done had he not been here! Even though I was taking Tylenol every 4 hours, along with cough medicine and my antibiotics, Will gave me no reason to worry how he was doing.... he was kicking me NON-STOP all day on Monday. Perhaps I just noticed it more since I was pretty immobile lying in bed, but even when I was sleeping, I was subconciously feeling his little kicks in my belly. So I told Drew yesterday at dinnertime that he's been kicking pretty hard, and that I was pretty certain that he'd be able to feel a kick or two VERY soon. And low and behold, as we were sitting on the couch later that evening, I felt a big kick, and told Drew to stick his hand on my belly... and there it was again! I think Drew was a bit shocked, as his daily attempts to feel those kicks were disappointing him the last 2 weeks. But finally... Baby kicks his Daddy. Now lets hope I can get big brother Matthew to hold his hand on my tummy long enough to feel a kick....

Dr. Moyer, how I miss you!

Well, I had my 20 week prenatal appointment yesterday... and my new OBGYN here in Milwaukee said that I'm up 18 pounds at the half way mark, which makes me on the road to gaining 40 pounds. I thought to myself "Ok, good! Better than my last pregnancy with Matthew!" Then she went on to say that she thinks that it's on the high end... Eeek. Her little lecture about how to "watch my weight going forward, but that some women do and still gain the weight regardless" still made me want to start crying. I then explained to her that with Matthew, I had gained 50 pounds while pregnant, and that my OBGYN (Dr. Moyer in Green Bay) never mentioned that he had a problem with it, and always told me that it wasn't something to worry about. I KNOW that I eat fairly decent, and that I get exercise with my Fit Mama Salsa Dance workout DVD (and also walks with Matthew).... so what the hell? Why can't all OBGYN's be like Dr. Moyer? Oh, how I miss him! He was such a wonderful Dr.

After my appointment, Matthew and I headed to the park for a picnic and some playtime with my lovely friends, Shannon and Brittny, and their kids. As I started complaining to them about my appoinment, I thought I was going to start crying - Thankfully, I didn't, but that's probably because Shannon's hubby, Naif, was there, and that'd probably make me feel even more ridiculous. So, naturally, what do real friends do? They comfort me by telling me that they too, had gained 40-50 pounds in each of their pregnancies, and also shared their stories of their Doctors "scolding" them about their weight. And again, this morning, my good (& pregnant)friend Sarah gave me a high five when I told her, because she had gained the same amount by her 20 week point a few weeks ago... AND that her Dr. had also said something to her about watching her weight. So, is it just the norm for most OBGYN's to say something to make us feel guilty? And did I just get lucky to have such a laidback Doctor the first time around? I don't know... After this vent, I'm going to stop worrying about it. The most important thing is that Will is healthy. And I know that I do eat fairly well, and am active on most days. However, I am going to make a regular schedule of my Salsa Dance and Prenatal Yoga... I think Matthew gets a kick out of watching me do it anyways...

Anyways, here's the first picure of my pregnant belly that I'm posting on my blog... Yeah, with all that extra 18 pounds too.

I almost forgot! Happy Cinco de Mayo! Have a margarita for me this year!

Oh BOY, was this Mama wrong!

We're having a baby BOY!!! I can hardly believe it yet... I'm going to be the Mama of TWO boys! It's all so very exciting - I'm so happy that Matthew will get to have a brother to play with (and I'm sure, to wrestle with, eventually). And best of all, Baby is HEALTHY. He's got ten little fingers and ten little toes... a good strong heart, kidneys, spine and skull... and he did not hesitate at all to show us his boy parts. He must be proud of his manhood already! Our ultrasound was in 2D, as well as 4D, so we got some amazing video of him. We caught him on camera smiling at all of us. It was so incredible!

We've already picked out his name. He will be named after Drew's Grandpa, as well as Drew. And now, the Zimmerman name will go on...
Here he is... our new little love.

William Andrew Zimmerman

A new normal

Well, I'm sure a lot of you have waited for me to post about SOMETHING relevant to what's going on in my life right now. Anyone that really knows me, knows that some big things have been occuring lately- and for those of you that don't, all you need to do is Google Matthew's dad's name to understand all what we are dealing with at the moment.
I am NOT going to write about my ex-husband though. I choose to focus and reflect on the positive things in my life - one of those things is, that we are adjusting to a new normal, and it is glorious!
When I got that positive pregnancy test back in January, I figured I had 9 months to try to readjust my schedule to accomodate my life as a full-time mom. Little did I know then, that come April, everything would change, and I woud once again have a little one, full time. That's right, Matthew is with us all the time. We have sole custody, and it is fantastic. Long gone are the anxiety filled days (especially Monday's) where I would just wait for the clock to hit 4:15 when I'd have to leave to drop him off with his dad. I would dread that drive, especially the one back home to Milwaukee - I felt so lonely with the empty car seat in the back. My little love, Matthew, is here, and is safe with us every day. I haven't been able to say that since he was 6 months old. I would always wonder what I was missing out on when he was away from me. Did he say a new word? Or learn a new fact? Or go to the zoo for the first time with out his Mama? Who would comfort him when he scraped his knee or fell off his bike?
I have to admit, it has been a little chaotic at times - I've been so used to the schedule of having him for 8 days, then not having him for 6 days (where I would get MOST of my stuff done) - that I had to quickly readjust how I did everything. I cleaned the whole house yesterday morning - a chore that surely will have to be done on the weekends now, especially when Jellybean arrives! I cannot tell you how awesome it feels to wake up on a Monday morning, to a ridiculously clean house, and also knowing that I don't have to make that drive to Kiel anymore. So long are the days where I have to schedule my play dates around the times when Matthew is here, or feel bad about having to miss out on one of his friends birthday's because he wasn't here... Matthew gets to participate in 100% of what's going on here, at home in Milwaukee.
Yesterday morning, Drew said to me... "Matthew is so giggly lately." I responded by saying "I think he feels more comfortable and sure of what to expect in his life right now." Drew agreed. Then I shared what Matthew had said to me early yesterday morning as I was making his pancakes for breakfast. Matthew looked up at me and said "Mom, I like it when I get to stay here. I love you and Daddy Drew so much." Then he hugged me and went about his morning. I had tears in my eyes - and I still do as I write about it now. How greatful I am to have a moment like that with my 4 year old son. How greatful I am that God has given me this gift of having him here with us. Albeit, I wish it were under better circumstances, but as the saying goes - When life gives you lemons, make some lemonade!
Thank you to EVERYONE who has been praying for Matthew, Drew and me and my family. We SO appreciate it all - and we feel the love! Baby Jellybean is growing stronger every day (I am starting to feel those kicks on the outside now!) Another thing to be thankful for.... Next week: Are we Team Pink or Team Blue?!

I'm thinking girl...

I had my 16 week appointment on Tuesday morning. Matthew and my Mom were able to join me. We heard that glorious heartveat again - going strong at 155! While I was pregnant with Matthew, his heartbeat was ALWAYS 140. So, perhaps thats why my instinct is to say girl because of that old wives tale of having a faster heart rate for girls. We'll see in a little over 2 weeks! I was informed my by OB/GYN that we'll be getting a 2D and a 3D ultrasound done with a perinatologist (a doctor specializing in fetal anatomy) and that we'll also be able to record the whole thing onto a DVD. How cool?! Baby's first video! I know it will be amazing, and I absolutely cannot wait. I purchased a "Big Brother" t-shirt for Matthew (on clearance at Kohl's for $5! Woot!) so I'm hoping he'll wear that for the BIG ultrasound! I'm sure he'll grab some attention.
I'm not feeling too creative in terms of writing today, but I just wanted to update you all! Once I have a good story to tell, I'll be sure to elaborate and humor you all here.

I heart my chiroprator!

For the last several weeks, I've been plagued with HORRIBLE headaches. Tylenol and caffeine wouldn't touch them. Laying down didn't really seem to help either. They had really just begun right as I entered my 2nd trimester in mid-March. So I did some research online (as I was getting desperate for some relief!) and low and behold, several articles recommended the use of a chiropractor for headache relief.
A little background: I've been seeing mine for about 18 months now, after I suffered a horrible pinched nerve in my back - which got so painful one day, that I couldn't breathe and had to call Drew home from work to get me into the car. At that point, my chiropractor had taken X-Rays and had told me how my 1st pregnancy with Matthew had really taken it's toll on my back, which was causing my problems. Ever since then, I've seen him regularly and my back pain has gotten alot better.
So, this past Monday, I was desperate to get rid of the headache from Sunday, so I called my chiropractor and Matthew and I made our way into his office on Monday afternoon. Once on the table, "Dr. Jim the Back Doctor" (as Matthew calls him) could immediately feel knots in my upper back, along with a lot of tightness going up through my neck. He cracked my back a few times, he cracked my neck a few more times... and WALLA! Just like that, my headache was gone. I wanted to frickin' hug the guy! I hadn't seen him since before my birthday a few weeks ago... which was also the week that Drew and I had had a "sleepover" in Matthew's new double bunk bed. That nights sleep (on a mattress that wasn't my own Euro-top mattress) was horrible and I suffered from a huge headache that entire next day. That must have been the culprit.
I'm so relieved to have not had a headache the last 2 days.... believe in the power of the "The Back Doctor"

Restored Faith

I feel like this post is going to be really cheesey... but it's honestly something I have been thinking about since Drew and I decided to start trying to concieve a baby.... and last night, as Drew was lying in bed with me, touching my belly he asked me, "So, do you like being pregnant?" I responded with "Yes, of course I do, and even more so now that I'm feeling a bit better and I'm not sick anymore... because that was really hard to feel so yucky." Then I moved on to describe to him what I'm about to describe to you all, in the best way that I can... I hope it makes sense.

This baby has really brought me some restored faith. Restored faith in what unconditional love is, and to WANT to create a life together because of that love. I can't even tell you how "cool" it is to me to have the baby that Drew and I created together growing inside of me. Drew and I have loved each other for such a long time. WAY longer than we have been together. The day I met him in October of 2000, I knew there was something about him that I just adored. And that "something" was not easy to shake... it stayed with me all through the last 10 years, and is still with me today. My husband is not perfect.... he gets on my nerves, and makes me angry (and I admittedly do the same to him, I'm sure). But above anything else, we love each other.... and we work hard to create a good life that we're both happy in.

Rewind 5 years ago... I found out I was prenant with Matthew, and I was no doubt, SO excited. I had always wanted to be a mother and at the time "thought" that Matthew's dad was the one I was supposed to create children with. Thought is the key word there. I really didn't believe it. We were not ready in our relationship to become parents. I was alone for alot of my pregnancy... I was not in the marriage I had hoped for, and it was disappointing. For so long, I felt that it was just Matthew and me... we were the team - which is partially why I adore him so much. The mother/son bond that we have helped me get through so much pain that I experienced. Those years where it was just him and me, created the unique bond that I will always have with him. He will always be my first "baby".

Fast forward 5 years, to now. Drew and I have a relationship that from the very beginning in those college dorm-days, has been built on friendship. What's better than to be married to a best friend? Don't get me wrong, we have the passion, and physical attraction... but first and foremost, we are friends... and now we are going to bring a life into this world that represents US. It's almost surreal to me! Whenever I feel a little kick or a flutter, I think to myself "This is OUR baby!" And it feels so right. And I believe in what it means to create a life out of unconditional love. It's another piece to my journey in finding restored faith... in what it is to have a good life.

So, for fun... here's us when were a mere 19 years old. Where this unconditional love started...

And the day we made the committment to keep that unconditional love going...

Goodbye nausea! Helllloooo appetite!

Yup, that's right.... the nausea is going away! I want to scream it from the roof tops! I do get small bouts of it from time to time (usually around bedtime) but I am feeling SO much better. However, as the nausea goes away, my appetite is in full force. I ate a ridiculous amount already today - and I know I'll be hungry again in a little while. I remember this from my pregnancy with Matthew - starting in the 2nd trimester. I couldn't fill myself up! On Saturday, my parents made this huge Irish feast.... I ate a ton... and then ate a delicious homeade chocolate cake that my sister brought....and seriously, I was not full when I was done. I kind of felt out of place as our guests talked about the food coma they were in, and I could've eaten more! Right before bedtime, everyone was talking about how full they still were, and all I could say was "Yeah, not me. I'm hungry again."
I am greatful that I'm starting to enjoy food again. I missed it terribly!

Oh, and did I mention that I think Drew is having those "Daddy pregnancy symptoms" right along with me? Last night, he was eating Oreos in bed at 10:30pm because he felt hungry (He usually NEVER eats past 8:30). He has also had backaches, headaches... among other things that I won't detail for you. :-) I call them sympathy pains....

I'm almost 14 and a half weeks now... Yesterday I recieved my first pregnancy comment from a complete stranger in Target. I was waiting in line to check out and a man in his mid-30's asked "if you don't mind me asking, how far along are you?" I looked up and smiled and said "Almost 4 months." He congratulated me and we both went about our business. Must have been the form fitting maternity shirt I was wearing.... but people are starting to notice the Baby Z BUMP! Woot!

28 years old!

28 years seems like a lot, doesn't it?
It sounds so much older than 27... and in 2 years, I'll be (gasp!) 30! In January when we got our positive pregnancy test, I did the math, and figured out that the week of my birthday would also be the week I jump to the second trimester. And I said to myself, and even wrote in my journal that all I wanted for my birthday was to get through the 1st trimester and have a healthy pregnancy. Thus far, my wish has come true, and for that I am SO thankful.
I'm spending the evening with my two favorite boys which is exacly what I wanted. Drew is grilling some bacon wrapped filets tonight (my meat adversions are slowly going away. I was able to happily cook and EAT pork chops last night - YAY!). Matthew and I are going to the store after he's done with school to pick out a birthday cake for Mommy. Matthew says that I should pick out cupcakes with basketballs on them... I was thinking green shamrocks, but we'll see. :-)
Every year on my birthday when I was growing up, my parents would cook this amazing Irish feast of corned beef, red potatoes, carrots, and cabbage (and usually topped off with ice cream cake from Dairy Queen), then a little bit of Bailey's for everyone too! They are coming down this weekend from Green Bay, and they are taking over my kitchen and cooking me my traditional birthday dinner as we celebrate together as a family. I'm really looking forward to it. I always really loved having my birthday on St. Patrick's Day - everyone is celebrating! So however you celebrate, enjoy your St. Patty's Day!

Cheers! ::clinks glass of water and pretends its some tasty green beer::

Destination Maternity

I must rave about my experience at Destination Maternity yesterday afternoon with Drew. We spent a good chunk of the afternoon at this fabulous store in Brookfield yesterday due to the fact that Drew wanted to buy me some new maternity clothes for my birthday. Taking Drew shopping is not something I look forward to... at all. I love my husband to death, but clothes shopping with him isn't something that we're "good at".
So we walk into the store and immedaitely the sales clerk asks me if I'd like some water or juice. I opted for the water. She then turns to Drew and says "and what about you, Dad, some water or juice?" With a huge grin on his face, Drew got the water too. So not only do they give beverages to soon-to-be-Mommies, they also know how important it may be to keep the Daddy's refreshed as well. (perhaps they know who will ultimately pull out the credit card?) We then proceeded to walk further into the store, and low and behold we find 4 leather chairs, parked in front of a flat screen TV turned to ESPN (They must know that on Selection Sunday, every man WANTS to be watching the NCAA's tournament matchups). With no hesitation, Drew gives me a kiss, sits himself in front of the TV (with his water and also a Men's Health magazine that the store also provided him with) and said "Have fun!" So, I'm thinking "SCORE! Drew is occupied while I wander about the hundreds of maternity clothes trying to find my perfect present. "
Every time a clerk saw me carrying something around, they immediately took it and put it in a dressing room, leaving me hands-free while I browsed. It was completely stress-free shopping! Even if Matthew had been there with us, they had a play area there with a TV turned to Nickelodeon.
As I tried on, Drew moved himself to be right outside my dressing room so he could give me his input - which was so helpful since I'm so indecisive when it comes to shopping for clothes for myself. By the end of the afternoon, we walked out with the most comfortable pair of maternity jeans (ever.), and a couple shirts.... Shopping day was a success! And honestly I owe alot of it to how wonderful Destination Maternity is and how they cater to growing families, and not just the growing Mommies. I'll definately be going back there in the near future for some more clothes.
Afterwards I got treated to a Sunday night dinner out at a really good restaurant where I ate BBQ ribs, mashed potatoes and turtle cheesecake.
My birthday week is off to a GREAT start....

A new journey has begun...

On a cold Friday morning in early January, I headed to the bathroom. A few minutes later, this is what we saw...

That's right! We did it! We've created a life - a new life that will be brought into this world sometime in mid-September (Right around Drew's birthday - perhaps he will share his birthday with his son/daughter?)

We are ecstatic, and I truly feel so blessed to be able to get pregnant so easily. The thing that worried me this time, was having an uneventful pregnancy. With having a miscarriage this past summer, there isn't a day that goes by where I don't worry. Every day since my positive pregnancy test, I pray. I pray to God and thank Him for the life that he has given me to grow. I pray that my little one is growing healthy and strong. And thus far, my prayers have been answered. I'm nearly 13 weeks along, and Baby Z (or "Jellybean" as Nanny has nicknamed him/her) has been growing perfectly - and just recently, I've felt tiny little baby kicks and jabs. I know it's super early, but I was reassured by my Doctor that a 2nd time mom, who is of a healthy weight can certainly feel her baby move right at the end of the 1st trimester. I remember those first kicks of Matthew's and this feels just like those - but I just can't believe how early on it is! Those feelings are very exciting, and also very reassuring too. i'm looking forward to those days when Drew and Matthew can feel the kicks too. I think it will certainly make it more "real" for them.

Below are some of Baby's first pictures from our earliest ultrasounds.

Baby at 6 weeks.

Baby at 8 weeks.

This past Tuesday, we had our 12 week appointment and we heard our baby's heartbeat for the first time. I seriously think that it is the most glorious sound, ever. Heartrate was in the 150's, which is, of course, perfect.

I have been pretty sick this pregnancy. The first trimester was filled with all-day-every-day nausea, gagging when brushing my teeth, lots of food aversions, exhaustion and constant hunger (but usually cannot think of anything I WANT to eat). All of this points to a healthy pregnancy, so that thought alone has helped me get through those tough days... because I know that it's all SO worth it in the end. I'm hoping as I hop onto that 2nd trimester wagon this week, I'll start feeling better.

So now that I've updated everyone and everyone is in "the know" I'll be blogging once or twice a week with pregnancy updates... and of course how we (Matthew, Drew and I) are all doing.
That's all for now...

Love from the growing Zimmerman family!

So I can blog again!

Now that our baby news is completely out, I can blog again! I was nervous to say anything (or even TRY to write about something else) until our entire family (and Drew's work) were told. I have a feeling that this blog will turn into a pregnancy blog, and then afterwards, a baby blog. I have been keeping a handwritten journal since we got our positive pregnancy test - but most of it just talks about how sick, tired and nauseous I have been feeling. Nothing too exciting, but hopefully within the next week or two, I will start getting past all the yuckiness, and be able to enjoy the growing belly! (and oh boy, is it starting to grow!) I will blog again in the next day or two...and will post all the ultrasound pics that we've had thus far. We have an appointment tomorrow, and hopefully we'll get to hear that beautfiul heart beating!