Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Seeking the Truth... Keeping the Faith...

This has been my motto.... for the last 4 years anyways. I've been through A LOT. More than most of you even realize. Today, I find myself incedibly lucky to be in the place that I am. Happily married to a man that I truly adore, with a healthy and beautiful 4 year old, pregnant with baby number two, a nice house and living in a city that I absolutely love. My life is far from perfect... I have my bad days, believe me... but most importantly, I find myself deep down happy. If you would have asked me 4 years ago if I would've thought my life would be the way it is today, I would have shaken my head and probably broken down in tears. The spring/summer of 2006 was my lowest point. I had made a decision to leave my husband at the time because of myself seeking the truth of who he really was. I was a 24 year old mom of an adorable 6 month old. I had a job that could barely pay my bills (let alone all the legal fees!) There were people that didn't believe me. There were people that would willingly pass along the rumors about me - how was I "crazy". For what? For leaving a man that was deceitful, untrustworthy, heartless and incapable of love? I had to push past all that nasty stuff and focus on what I knew to be true in my heart. At a mere 24 years old, I did my own investigating, and found out what I knew to be the truth - even though it hurt.... a ton! I had a lot of support from my family - they are a huge reason I am where I am today. Throughout all the turmoil, I kept the faith. I believed. I had hope. I had to have faith that everything happens for a reason. God has a plan. I believed that one day I would have everything that I wanted, and deserved. I showed resilience. I knew deep down that good things would happen to me... and slowly, but surely, they did. I took risks in love. I put myself out there. I had patience. I continued to believe. Going through the bad things, makes the good things that much more sweet.
I still need to remind myself to keep the faith. There will forever be reminders of what I went through... and recently, those reminder get thrown in my face a lot. Many of those reminders are hard to swallow. The things that are plastered across the news on TV... they are hard to hear... but I continue to keep the faith. I am ever so greatful that I knew to seek the truth several years ago. If I hadn't, my life would be tremendously different right now, and undoubtedly, I wouldn't be as happy as I am. I have many people to thank for the roles they played in helping me get to where I am now. You know who you are. I love you... and thank you.

As my husband continues to tell me... onward and upward!

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