Emotions!

I have to admit, my emotions have been running seriously high lately. I'm not sure if it's Matthew's changing schedule for the summer, adding more responsibility to my plate with getting a part time job at The Children's Place, or missing my husband from the countless hours he has been spending at class, or preparing for class, or studying for class or doing homework for class. All are certainly valid reasons, I'm sure, but the last couple of days, I'll just get teary eyed and not really understand why. There's nothing horrible going on in my life right now, and I truly feel satisfied and happy at where I am today.
For instance, I was just vacuuming and dusting Matthew's room as part of my "every-other-Tuesday-clean-like-a-mad-woman-routine"; I grabbed a handful of his clothes and towels he used yesterday to throw in the laundry. As I inhaled the sweet smell of his baby sunblock still on his "dirty" clothes, I started crying. I miss my little boy. People often ask me how in the world I go 6 or 7 days in a row without seeing my son. I usually always respond with something along the lines of "I've been doing it for so long now, that it doesn't really bother me." Well, I guess I wouldn't consider that the whole truth. Although it really doesn't get much harder, it really doesn't get any easier either. It's also been really hard to see Drew say goodbye to Matthew. My husband isn't an emotional person, but the look in his eyes when he gives Matthew that final hug and kiss for the week pains me. Don't get me wrong, Drew and I take advantage of our "child-free" days by going out together and relaxing a bit more - but it's obvious that we both feel that something is missing when he isn't here. We talk about him. ALOT. :-)
I'm looking forward to having more things to occupy my time while he's gone, and while Drew goes to school - and my part time job at The Children's Place should do just that. I start Wednesday afternoon - wish me luck! It's been a while since I worked in retail!